31 March 2009

The Complexities of Unproductivity

I have been writing about Manhattan Corbacher since I was sixteen years old. I am now twenty three and nothing has been completed.

The futility of my effort is understandable: He is immortal. I am not.

I have begun to draft random informational pieces about his daily life in an attempt to achieve full comprehension of his identity. Basically, I am writing a biography about a fictional character in the hope of eventually figuring out his story.

As if this was not unnecessarily time-consuming in and of itself, I've taken to chronicling his infinite life span in intervals of two seconds.

I am doomed. It's okay. So is he.

2 Second Biographies (III) - Mr. Corbacher peels off a Nighttime Rejeuvenation facial mask.

He imagines rubbing out a freckle

truncating the reign of a melanic dynasty,
a myopic aspect of his being since the summer he turned seven

and suffered his first sunburn.

30 March 2009

2 Second Biographies (II) - Mr. Corbacher retrieves Miles Davis' "Kind of Blue" from a crate in his attic.

Within the transitory silence between titles he re-discovers a color
simultaneously rose and asphalt

the very hue of a misplaced hair-pin
belonging to an ex-girlfriend from whom he last extracted himself

half a century ago.

2 Second Biographies (I) - Mr. Corbacher takes a tentative first sip.

During the harried aftermath of yet another false alarm
this one caused by a too-hot beverage (a take-away container of morning coffee)

he snaps his head backwards.

As he allows his tongue to furl towards the back of his throat
he dissects the situation, aided by recollections of similar episodes

and wonders if anything is different.

05 March 2009

with the qualities of a pheasant

Granted, this is hilarious even if you weren't raised within range of a Korean-American community whose cultural events included bouts of old-people karaoke...

But the sheer accuracy of it all! The way Bret squints at the lyrics, like so many middle-aged Koreans whose visions are weakening! The inevitably mortifying dance he is somehow compelled to perform as he relaxes into the song! The barrage of random stock footage in the background!

Also, he has excellent pronunciation! Like creepily excellent. Like better than people I know who've been living and studying in Korea for years excellent.